10 February 2012

OMG ur my bff ur txt r wtf made me lol

Yeah.  That should probably be 'nuff said, but no, I'll go on.

Texting is convenient.  It's fun sometimes, other times it's semi-necessary.  Like when you remember in the middle of dinner with your parents that you forgot to tell your husband not to mention that your mom's meatloaf gives you indigestion.  Or that your daughter got a new tattoo.

Otherwise, there's a time and a place.

Having existed in a pre-texting world, I know for a fact that there are some things it's entirely possible to do without having a phone either attached to your skull or your fingertips.

I'm going to come up with a texting collar.  Slap it on in the morning and it's like one of those dog collars that gives you a jolt when you go too far.  Pretty sure I'll be using it all the time.

I once went to a gun show and this guy asked me if I wanted to look at a tazer.  I told the guy that would be like giving a ball to a kid on a playground.  Impossible not to play with.  If I had a tazer I'd be in jail within minutes.  Literally.

Since I'm in a mood and texting rules don't really exist, I made my own list for your reading entertainment, and well to be distributed world-wide when the shock collar debuts.

Do not text when you're completing a transaction.  Anywhere.

Do not text while you're driving, even at stoplights because that light always turns green before you're done and then I'm sitting behind you wishing you had on a dog collar so I could zap your rear end repeatedly.

Do not text WHILE I'm trying to have a conversation with you.  UGH!

Do not text during dinner, in or out, dinner is for eating and for talking.  To actual people.  Who talk back.

If you're going to text in the movie theatre, at least turn the volume off so I don't have to listen to your asinine notification tone when you get eight billion texts back during the movie.

Do not text me back with "k".  If I've gone to the trouble to text you, you can at least give me a whole word in return.  Is it really that hard to add and "o" and an "ay"?

Do not forward jokes texted to you to every single person on your contact list.  It's annoying.

Do not text me a photo of you penis or your breasts, if I wanted to see that, I'd have asked.

For this rant, the last and perhaps most important is to remember that English is actually a language and should be used as such.  I don't have a degree in deciphering semi-words or letters into a legible sentence.  Unless you're FOUR and you're texting me, please try to speak in complete sentences.  If you can't survive without throwing in a "u" or a "ur" please just wait until you see me and skip the text altogether, or here's a thought......

Pick up the phone and call me.

Then again, maybe I'm just being a grumpy old woman.  Do you have pet text peeves?


  1. I lk ttly agre wth u on this 1. Txting shrtcts ar a pita!

    And don't text LOL unless you actually Laughed out freeking loud!

    Cranky Old Man

    1. I know right!?!?! LOL must be the single most overused acronym on the planet.

  2. yeah i hate it completely and turns teenagers heads to garbage lol!!! I don't own a cell phone. We have a house phone and cell that goes with whoever leaves the house, basically for me or hubby when he is at work. Granted he work... which he doesn't right now lol. When my kid's want a cellphone they'll be paying for it... because i'm cheap and i wont pay for all the texting they need lol!!

    1. My daughter got her cell when she was 15 because we got a great deal from a company that sold out to AT&T. They grandfathered her plan so she still has the same plan four years later. With her being a new driver, I'm glad she has it glued to her body, but I agree that the whole text phenomenon has seriously damaged teenagers ability to actually communicate. She's getting past that now thank God and prefers talking to texting but for a while there it was freakishly annoying!

    2. man I believe it I HATE talking on the phone sometimes... so irritating lol

  3. I've never got into the whole texting thing. Never sent a text. I don't think I even know how to send a text. I talk to people - the old fashioned way - with my voice.

    1. I admit I text a LOT. My best friend is in New York for one, and I worked a job for three years where I was on call 24/7/365 so I got reeeeal tired of being on the phone, but I'm still of the mindset that there's a time and a place. I much prefer talking like you do, to people, using actual vocal chords!

  4. I have a few rules too!
    Don't text me instead of calling me back and expect me to participate in a full conversation.

    Don't send me a book-texts are 160 characters for a reason. Going over occassionally is okay, but every text??

    Don't continue a text conversation when someone says they are having a horrible day. Pick up the phone like a good friend and call, asap.

    I'm in college and I hate that people would rather text than talk to each other when walking to class, etc.

    Let me know when you find those collars, I want to buy one too!

  5. I am with you on the collars. And the taser!

    My biggest irritation with texting, besides the text speak and shortened words- If you shoot me a text or three, back and forth and we are both obviously holding out phones, just call me and talk. It goes much faster. I can understand if you are with someone, but then why are you texting me???


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