Dear Etsy

Okay so, this is how it's gonna be.

You're gonna demand all my time, and money I don't have before you'll make me famous, oh and richer than I could have thought possible.  Great.  I'm not liking you right now.  Have I mentioned I sleep a lot?  However am I supposed to create these scads of fun, interesting, creative designs for you if I sleep all the time!


Not to mention, where Dear Etsy, shall I come up with the money to get started hmmm?  Haven't you ever heard of starting small and building?  Guess I can't really blame you since you're just there and you too are at the mercy of much more devoted and financially secure crafters than I.

I will tell you though that I will not give up.  I have friends you know?  Blogging friends.  They're awesome.  Not that I expect them to buy all my stuff mind you, but they know people, and networking is a wonderful thing.  So I'll show them my stuffies, and maybe if I get lucky they'll love them and want them, and then I can buy more stuffies to make more stuffies and one day dear Etsy.....you'll be seeing me.  We'll have a great and wonderful relationship and I'll promise to love you forever.

We'll have lots of fun together and we'll spend hours and hours building our relationship so just you wait.  The time is coming!

But now, I'm going to go talk to my friends.  You know, the wonderful ones?  I'm going to show them this little owl organizer, he's sooo adorable.  Felted for soft fluffy wonderfulness and hand stitched to make him look even cuter!  He's sitting on a really neat little organizer so my friends will be able to actually USE him instead of having him sitting around just looking cute.  Even though he does that well too!  Soon he's going to have friends too.  I loved making him so much I'm going to make ornaments, and plushies, and maybe even a little coin purse just like him!  He'll only be $12 too which is a fabulous deal for a handcrafted planner!  I bet you're jealous aren't you!


Then I'll show them the winter floral arrangement I made.  I bet you'd like it.  It's in a small clear glass vase with sprigs of holly and evergreen, berries and pinecones and a few little deep red poinsettias thrown into the mix.  It's not too big so it'll sit almost anywhere, and give a wintery happy feel to foyers or dining room tables, or even in the bed or bath.  The colors are beautiful and the shimmery red and gold bow makes it festive enough for the holidays, but transitional enough to see you through until winter's end.

I had a lot of fun making it, but then I love doing floral arrangements.  I've got them all over my house and it makes up for the fact that I can't keep a plant living to save my life.  With florals I can still have the warm feeling without being sad when even my cactus gives up and falls over to the side of it's little gravel vase deader than four in the morning.

My favorite part though is the lighted branches.  It looks really beautiful without even being lighted, but when you flick on the little battery box in the back of the arrangment, the sprigs come to life and it's so cheery and happy it would make even YOU smile!

You can't really see them well in the photograph, but it's awesome when you see it in person.  I set it on my coffee table while we watched a movie and it was the perfect little accent to make a nice warm cozy environment.  I'd pack it up nice and neat to send it to whoever might want it for oh about $40 plus shipping, and I bet they'd love it!  My daughter even told me not to let you see it because she wanted it, but she's got enough stuff in her room already!

So you see Etsy?  I'll keep trying to woo you, but until then, I'll just keep plugging along and one of these days you'll be seeing my name, and my stuffies.  I've got so many ideas and you're going to love them!  The felt was so much fun to work with, and I'm going to dig out my box 'o craft stuff, so I'll be making things left and right when I'm awake and when I get enough, then we'll dance!

Until then, I'll tell my friends if they are interested in either of these things to leave me a comment here or email me at djpr[at]comcast[dot] net to work out the specifics.  Have a great day Etsy and I'll be seeing you soon!

Love always,
A Financially Challenged Crafter

NOTE:  The owl planner is almost finished, I only need to secure it and do the finishing stitched.  Price is $12 plus shipping.  I'm also going to be doing ornaments and plushies so let me know if there is anything you can't live without!

The floral arrangement is completed and I'm asking $40 plus shipping for it.  It measures approximately 19 inches top to bottom and 15 in diameter.  Batteries are included for the lighted swigs, it takes three AA.

If you know anyone who might be interested in either of these, please send them in my direction and I promise I won't keep begging everyone to buy stuff!

Etsy? Love it? Hate it? Advice?

So through all my lovely friends here in the blogosphere I've discovered Etsy.

I know I know, I'm so out of it, but I swear, I'd never heard of it until recently.

Going through the site, I got that creative tickle that starts somewhere inside your cranium and then proceeds to engulf your entire body.  I used to be really good at making stuff.  When I first started taking Ritalin and Adderall, I was up for a week straight making things.  I love crafting, but I really don't go out much so networking has been out of the question until now.

I tried an eBay store once up a time, a very long time ago, but I just tired of the whole thing since there is SO much there I found things becoming devalued just because there were a million other people selling the same things.  People didn't look for quality or originality it seemed as much as the lowest bid.

But now....Etsy looks cool to me.  I love the guidelines for what can be offered and it seems very user friendly.

Skipping the usual humor for a moment, I'll give you a brief overview of things going on with me right now.

I poke fun at being a narcoleptic, but it's frustrating.  Maddening most times.  I actually envy people who can't sleep.  I sleep anywhere from 14 to 18 hours every day, so it's almost impossible to keep up with the usual things most people do every day.  After being laid off four years ago and being owed almost seventeen thousand dollars in back pay that I'll never get (yes, I've tried.  Everything) we've struggled financially.  We've gone into foreclosure three times and have thus far  managed to keep our house at the cost of my husbands retirement plan.

I won't bore you with the specifics, but at this point every extra dollar helps.

Along comes Etsy.  I registered last night, but I didn't complete it cuz of the $1.01 cent transaction.  Until hubby gets paid tomorrow, there was the very real possibility that the buck and a cent would overdraft our account.  What I really wanna know is have any of you started a shop or have a favorite shop you frequent?  Do you love it?  Do you think it's worth having a go at?  Oh and what kind of things are you looking for when you go?

I've pulled out the infamous "box o' craft stuff" and I'm ready to give it a try, but wanted to know what YOU think before I jump in feet first.

Thank you all for a super duper lovely day!

To everyone who has stopped by, commented or clickied the little follow link, thank you so much!

I promise I'll do everything I can to make it worth the click!

Very special thanks to For The Love Of Blogs for featuring me today and introducing me to new friends!

It's been a great day and since I've now got an obscene case of carpal tunnel from clicking stats eight BILLION times, think I'll head off to bed for the night!

Thank you everyone for making this a fantastic day for me!

Much lovies!

For the Love Of Blogs Totally Rocks My Cow Slippers!

Yes honey bunnies, it's true!  I crawled out of my nice warm bed to find my little space in the interwebs their featured blog today!  Thank you!

Color me giddy!  I think I squee'ed too!  My husband thinks I'm crazy now, but that's nothing new really.  He had no idea he had a fetish for psychos till he married me and I think it still surprises him sometimes.  Like an addiction.  Takes you a while to come to terms with something like that.

Anyhoo, I'm wandering again.  I do that.

Now that it's out of the way, thank you to the little darlin' over at For The Love of Blogs for featuring me today! It's my first time in the spotlight, and I owe it all to her.  I feel like I should be getting together a speech now!

I'd like to thank my fans, all the people who've read my blogs, my cats, the lady next door.....

Don't RUN!  Please!  I'll stop, really....

What I wanted to say is thank you to everyone who stops by, whether it's to read or follow.  I appreciate both.  Leave me a comment and let me know what you liked or didn't like, ask me questions, or just tell me a little about yourself, I'll probably be glued to this chair for the rest of the day now!

I'm having so much fun with blogging, I've been posting on both my blogs every day now for over a month, so I hope that I'll be a daily stop for some of you, and I really hope that I can offer you something to make your visit worthwhile.  So stay long enough to say hi, and I'll be sitting here.  Waiting.  Squee'ing.

Lovies!

There Is Nothing That Makes You Feel Old Faster.....

than the holidays.

I think I've aged 20 years in the past week.  That's not even taking into consideration the pounds that I'm steadily packing on with Thanksgiving Dinner III right around the corner.  I think my scales have run away from home.  Maybe they went to live with Kate Hudson.  Now THAT would be nirvana for scales.

I woke up this morning before seven.  I can't even begin to describe the agony of me, a narcoleptic, seeing the sun rise.  Two days in a row no less.  Oh and it wasn't the boyfriend who was in the driveway yesterday morning.  It was (ahem) another boy.  We won't go there.  Not now. 

I went back to sleep eventually and woke up realizing two things.  One.  My house is a wreck.  Two.  There's a Christmas tree and decorations in the attic and they're yelling at me.  

"Come geeeeet me!  I want to plaaaaaay."

I swear, that's what they're saying.  I hate them.  I might leave them up there until next year just to punish them for tormenting me.  I've got a whole year of guilt trips planned, I didn't need their help.

When we bought our living room furniture, I made the mistake of thinking my room is bigger than it really is.  Now I've got to figure out where to stash a tree so that I can still walk through the room.  Plus, I've got kitten cats this year.  Ones who have never seen a Christmas tree.  Four of them.  Little monsters.  Plus the thirty pounder that's been there done that and left a nest in the middle of the tree last year so she can easily find her favorite place to sleep this year.

I'm thinking it's going to be an interesting week.

But hey, at least I don't have a scale to mock me.  Pretty sure my skinny jeans will do that just fine.

Black Friday? Not. Another Turkey Dinner? Hell yeah!

Woke up brain impaired this morning.  Might be a symptom of tryptophan.

Only reason I woke up at 6 a.m. this morning was hearing the alarm bell ding on the house, and the sound of my husband snoring.  Huh?  Yes.  So I crawl out of my nice warm bed, disengage myself from the six cats sleeping on my bed and drag on my pajama pants before my ass freezes. I grabbed my glasses so I can get down the stairs without pulling the same stunt my daughter did yesterday.  Yes honey bunnies, heels and stairs equate to snowboarding or sledding down that hill in San Fransisco, but with snow.  At least for my daughter.  It wasn't pretty.

So the moment I get my glasses on I see the front end of my daughter's boyfriends' car peeking out past our pear tree in the front yard.

What?

Huh?

You're KIDDING me.

Right?

Oh well.  Content that we are not about to be set upon by a different kind of Black Friday shoppers, you know, the ones who decide what they want and simply go get it without the hassle of malls and money?  I went back to bed.

Now it's time to go help cook another Thanksgiving dinner with my parents.  Yesterday was the in-laws.  Today is the parents.  Tomorrow is mine.  I'm ready.  I ate a bowl of popcorn last night to help digest the turkey and stuffing sitting in the bottom of my stomach like a brick, and whether it helped or not I'm not sure, but I'm ready for more turkey.  And yes loves, MY mom sends home doggie bags so I can have a turkey sammich tonight.

For all those lovelies who are worried about my cat scratch fever infested wrist?

No worries, I took my rings off this morning, grabbed a bottle of antibiotics I didn't finish from my last brush with misadventure and have the fingers of my other hand (that aren't swollen to resemble those little sausages you roll up croissants) crossed.

I am not a turkey, no matter what kitty thinks!

Once upon a time there was a kitty cat.

This kitty cat decided that she wanted a little taste of Thanksgiving.

So whatever did the kitty do?

She BIT me.

Apparently I either look, or maybe smell like a turkey?

Maybe it was the arms, although I'm pretty sure they don't look much like wings.

Who knows.

What I do know is that now my daughter thinks I have mange.

It's not pretty, nor does it feel good.

I think she got bone, or maybe bone marrow.

Ugh.

Don't blame her though, it wasn't reeeeeally her fault.

I'm a sucker for kitty cats, so while I was outside putting up Christmas decorations, I heard her crying.

So what did I do?

I meowed at her.

She came running.

I picked her up.

She got a claw or three stuck in my sweater.

She couldn't get them out.

I couldn't get them out.

She didn't like me trying to get them out.

She proved it.

Oddly enough, she forgave me for prying her claws out of my clothes.

I'm still on the fence about forgiving her.

My wrist looks like I shoved a golf ball under the skin.

It's red.

It's hot.

It hurts.

I can't bend it.

Now I'm gonna go to bed and hope that I do NOT have mange.

Or rabies.

Or tetanus.

Oh and she is SO not getting any table scraps tomorrow.

The Blog Guidebook - A Must Follow!

I'm not even sure how I found this site, but if you're into blogging it's amazing.

Ever wanted to know how to customize your fonts like some people do?

They've got it.

Ever wondered how to do all the little neat tricks that you see on other blogs?

They've got that too.

Ever wanted to be featured on a blog that has umpteen hundred followers?

Well, they can do that for you too.

Seriously?  I've seen a lot of blogs about blogging and this one is by far the neatest, most comprehensive, and all together wonderful site I've found so far.  Sure you can find the technical stuff about increasing views and optimization and all that, but it's the "look" stuff that got me and dragged me in.  The page is awesomely designed, lots of information compacted into simple sections that make browsing through everything there a pleasure instead of a nightmare, and honey?

That's worth more to me than well, a lot of stuff.

I'd strongly suggest everyone check it out, browse the topics and click on the featured pages, I'm guessing it'll take me months if not longer to get through it all.

For a limited time, you can get a free button listing if you submit your blog to their list of featured blogs, and yes, that's part of the reason I'm writing this, but the main reason is that it's an awesome resource if you're serious about giving your blog audience a visit that's more than just informational, dare I say enjoyable?

Check it out!

Blogging in the Mommy Blog World

Having been a new mom 18 years ago, I've discovered something recently.

You guessed it, I'm old.  Older than dirt I think.  Or maybe dinosaurs.  Or God.  Maybe the universe.

Since this is my second blog, and the one that will probably bypass most of the testosterone audience (unless they have a tendency to search the web for pin-up girls) I've been trying to market this one a bit more aggressively.

Since I solemnly refuse to go around posting "follow me, follow me, pleeeeeeeeeeze" on social media networks and forums the world over, I did what most people would do.  I found a few blogs I really really liked and joined the blog hops there.

The only problem with that, well not really a problem, unless you enjoy feeling like the zit on a dinosaurs ass, is that there are a plethora of "mommy blogs" out there and well, I'm "over-qualified" in that arena.  There, I said it.  On the plus side, it's nice to be over-qualified.  I think.  Unless you're looking for a job, or blogging and trying to maintain the illusion that you're not REALLY all that old.

I can tell you that putting your baby on the washing machine, or driving them around to get them to sleep is a bad, bad idea.  Yep.  Unless you want to be tied to the washer or the car for the next three years and have to miss your favorite show on tv because you've got a terrible two who refuses to sleep because now he's used to being vibrated to sleep, or lulled into semi-consciousness.

I can tell you to not stop vacuuming or playing the radio at full blast when your new baby comes home.  Make those little miniature people get through the noise to get to sleep, otherwise you'll be living in a tomb for the next so many years because baby will wake up if you fart audibly.

I can tell you to check the feet of those little sleeper pajamas because all kinds of things find their way into the feet of those suckers in the washing machine and such things wrap around little toes, and if you've got a little boy, yeah, that stuff wraps around other things too.  Innocent things like hairs and strings can subject your little boy to a lifetime of gym harrassment. 

I can tell you that you WILL hear a thump one morning when your little angel discovers the crib doesn't go all the way to the ceiling.

I can tell you that your toddler will most assuredly eat things you will be mortified to discover just because they can.  This will also happen no matter how many hours you spend watching your little darling.  They're magic like that.

I can tell you that there will come a time that your precious little angel will lose at least one thing that you thought you couldn't live without.  Unless you've got a gun safe and keep anything and everything you love inside it.

I can tell you that just because your child likes to climb the walls and turn your ceiling fan into a jungle gym doesn't mean they're ADHD.  They're kids!  Stop medicating them for being kids.  Believe it or not, YOU know your kid better than the pediatrician.  Trust your instincts.  Use Ritalin when it's needed, not to suck the fun out of being a kid and doing crazy things to drive you crazy.

I will tell you that the first day of preschool, and kindergarten, and middle school and high school are oh so emotional, but more for you than the kids.  They're resilient like that.  By the time they meet the teacher, they've forgotten all about you until it's time to go home again.

I can tell you that pictures are priceless, but people get tired of looking at them.  Don't take it personally, they still love you.

I can tell you that the day will come when you'll question yourself as a parent, if you haven't already.  That day will the day your husband and/or wife will need to bring home chocolate and/or alcohol.  That too is okay, it'll pass, and you'll discover that you're going to screw up your kids one way or another.  You can't help it, there isn't a manual and no one would want a perfect kid anyway, that would be boring.

I can tell you that it's easy to be over-protective and hard to not be, but it's the most important thing you can do for your child to let them live and learn as much as is safe and possible.  That's the only way they learn how to become functioning adults.

I'll tell you there will come a day when you WILL want to commit murder in the name of your child.  Don't.  Please.  Think about how much they'd  miss you if you were in prison.  Daydream about it instead.  Or keep a journal where you can do whatever you want to the idiots in private.

I'll share that as they grow older they'll make decisions you won't agree with and part of being a good parent is realizing when they're old enough for you to sit down and discuss those decisions with them instead of trying for force your decisions on them.

I'll tell you that lying to your child is never a good idea.  Unless it's about Santa or the Easter Bunny, and even then things can get tricky.  If your kid asks if you ever did drugs or had sex before you got married?  Tell 'em the truth.  When it's time of course, procrastination works wonders when perfomed properly.  Your kids will respect you a lot more for owning up to your past, mistake or not, than they will when they discover (and they will) that you lied to them.

I'll tell you finally that the years will go by far too quickly, so you should make memories every day of their lives.  Before you know it they're grown and starting out on lives of their own and you'll still be reminiscing about the days you were writing your mommy blog about Little Suzie's first step or the first time Little Johnny went pee pee in the potty.

So there you have it.  I'm old.  I'm overqualified.  I've been there, done that, and you know what?  I'm still learning.  I've bypassed the days of having a baby, and a little girl, and a tween, and graduated to the time when I have a best friend, a daughter, a beautiful young woman who is no longer a little me, even though shes so much like me in so many ways it scares the hell out of me.  She's not perfect by any means, but she's mine, and I like to think that at the end of the day I survived the experience mostly intact, a little battered with a few heartaches along the way, but all in all?  I wouldn't change a thing, even if it meant I was 29 again.

Okay so FOUR Turkey Dinners and maybe some Killer Clowns on the side

Okay, yesterday I wrote about the challenges of working out the holiday schedules when there are in-laws and boyfriends involved.  Little did I know that there is a simple and easy fix to these challenges.  Imagine that.

Spoke to my Mother on the phone today and she asked if we'd figured out what we're doing for Thanksgiving.  I politely told her we were to have dinner with the in-laws.  Usually I'm cringing when I say that.  Some days my mom is a little on edge (as in waiting for someone to come along unsuspecting so she can throw them off), but today, I was shocked.  She said simply, "Well then, we'll have Thanksgiving on Friday."

Wow.

Really?

So I get two highly experienced cooks making Thanksgiving feasts for me two days in a row?

WHOOOOO!

If only I could take muzzles, life would be el-perfecto!

Did I just say that out loud?  No.  Pretty sure I didn't.

So, going on.

The funny part about all this is for some reason I don't feel like a proper wife and mother if I don't cook too.  Now, remember, I said I've got a turkey breast in the freezer?  Well that lil' bad boy is going in the oven Friday night.  Yep.  I'm taking leftovers from my mom's house too.  So I don't have to make the stuffing.  Or maybe I'll just go for it and do that too.  I've got my turkey breast, sweet potatoes, some wheat yeast rolls, pretty sure I've got some kind of green stuff, and then stuffing and we're done.  Day three of Turkey marathon.

Maybe I can get leftovers to take home from the in-laws too.  It's impossible to have TOO many turkey sammiches, and we all know werewolves and killer clowns make one crave turkey sammiches.

Anyway, I'm content now.  Thankfully dinner can only last SO long, and I'm pretty sure I can keep my mouth shut long enough to not get in a whole world of hurtin' at the in-laws.  We already have the list of "do not talk about" topics for my mothers house, so as long as she behaves herself and doesn't start saying things about husbands and boyfriends, we'll be fine.  I hope.

Oh, remind me to take out my piercings too.  Naaaaaah, I'm a rebel, they can deal.  Maybe I'll even roll up my sleeves and show off the tats too!  There's a rebel, now all I need is a Harley and some leathers and I'll be a regular degenerate.

Cooking Thanksgiving dinner at home on Saturday.

Oh, and I'm so asking the daughter to bring home leftovers from her dinner with the boyfriend on Sunday too.  They're waiting cuz the dad there is going hunting on Thanksgiving day.  So we'll be Sweatin' with the Oldies together working off the turkey fat!

Wish me luck!

Turkey Sammiches and Werewolves

What's a girl to do when there's too many chores to be done?

Sit down with a nice toasty cup of cocoa and write a blog of course!

So I'm suddenly realizing that it's the weekend before Thanksgiving.  Now I'm stressing because I've got three Blockbuster Online movies here now, one watched, two to go and this coming week, well we'll all be here at home.  Kitty has school Monday and Tuesday, but after that it's a free ride til next Monday.  So whatever will we all do to keep from killing each other together as a loving family?

The only time Thanksgiving is EVER simple is before you start dating.  After that you'll forever and I do mean EVER have guilt trips challenges to overcome.

I still have NO idea whatsoever what our collective families are doing for Thanksgiving Dinner.  I've got a turkey breast in the freezer, but my daughter has yet to tell me what she's doing for Thanksgiving, my in-laws have tentatively invited us to their house and of course my Mom expects us to be there too whether she says it out loud or not.

I've horrid fond memories of the last time we visited the in-laws.  My husband and brother-in-law had a very awkward and horrifying lovely fight discussion about my father-in-law taking better care of himself.  Now, its been decided that perhaps family visits should be shuffled so everyone isn't there at once.  I'm thinking that might be nice.  I don't really have any problems with my in-laws in spite of my mother in law thinking I'm a bad influence on my daughter because I have piercings.  The problem is that I don't really have anything in common with them anymore.  So family get-togethers end up being my family sitting quietly listening to the rest of the family talking about things we have no interest in or people we don't know.  Ce' la vie.

My family isn't always better.  I remember a few Christmases when my mom and stepdad were fighting and didn't even open their presents until after New Years.  I think that's all in the past, but my mother has reached the point in her life where she has no compunctions about telling you how she feels.  Exactly how she feels.  Not great when she doesn't particularly like your husband or your daughters boyfriend.  

Maybe that's why so many people dread the holiday season.  No matter how much I love my husband and daughter, I can't help but remember how much easier things were during the holidays before they came along. Easier is rarely better though and case in point here.  I'd much rather have them in my life even though I get to deal with enjoy snide adoring comments from in-laws and family.  Now I'm thinking about what we're going to do and you know what?

I figure we'll endure enjoy the company of friends and family, eat about three dinners and roll come home fat and thankful that another Thanksgiving has come and gone, sit down and watch a werewolf flick and maybe in the wee hours of the morning fix ourselves a turkey sammich.  All's fair in love, war and holidays.

Growing Old Gracefully - You're Kidding Right?

My first post on the new blog. I'm having a party to celebrate and you're all invited. The address is....hm. Probably shouldn't do that. Skip the party, I'll be thinking about you. I promise. Or maybe watching new wrinkles form around my eyes.

No, I'm not growing old gracefully. I've got a jackhammer with my name all over it and honey, I'm not afraid to use it! If I had the money, I'd be having face lifts and botox injections so I too could look like every celebrity that's managed to stick around past their twenties. No, I have no shame. Not when it comes to aging. 

I. Don't. Like. It.

At all. One little bit. Nary at all. It sucks. I want my butt back. I'd like to be able to find my boobs without sending out a search and rescue party when I lie down. I want to go to bed without smelling of formaldehyde. In little sexy outfits even. I want my bedside table back.  I used to have pretty little things there. Photographs, candles, a little journal. 

Now I can't even find a place to lay my phone down for the bottles of creams and fillers....UGH.....yes ladies and gentlemen, they call them fillers. Like putty. Or spackle. What kind of marketing genius is that huh? Now I can feel like a house without even looking at my rear end in the mirror. Oh wait......I don't have a rear end anymore.  

Now, I have a magnifying mirror. Tweezers. Fillers. Hair color. Dare I say it.....a girdle even. I haven't reached the depths of depravity that would cause me to actually wear it, but it's there for when that day comes. I can no longer combine comfort and sexy. If I look good, I have to pay the piper. If I'm comfy, well I darn sure don't look good. We won't even talk swimsuits. I refuse to bow down to the requirements of age where swimwear is concerned. I'd rather remain pasty, even if my family has to wear shades when I show my legs.

I spend my nights tweezing, buffing, exfoliating, slathering, shaping, sloughing, shaving, stretching and weeping for the days when my bedtime ritual consisted of a shower and a sexy little nightie.

To make matters worse, I live with an eighteen year old daughter.

Am I jealous of her? Naaaah. Would I rip off her left boob to have her body? Maybe. Who am I kidding, I'd settle for just her skin. When you're that age, you can still use the term alabaster when talking skin. At my age, words like granite, concrete and stucco come to mind.  

So yes, I'm fighting. Kicking. Screaming. Swearing from time to time. And when I have money, I'm hitting up the aisles at Walgreens for the next new miracle that promises to restore youth and elasticity. I'm stalking Victoria's Secret picking out the bras I want when I have a nice young doctor put my nipples back where they're supposed to be. I'm considering asking my husband for that chemical he uses at work to see if I can make a do it yourself botox cocktail.

Until that time comes, you can find me in my cow pajamas with makeup case in hand.  Just in case I have to go to the mailbox. After all, we all know the second you walk out of the front door in your pajamas and no makeup is when Hugh Jackman will wander up to your house, lost and looking for the nearest Starbucks.

Legal Stuff

Let's get this out of the way since well, I can't afford to be sued.

1.  All artwork on this site has been gathered from various sources on the web.  It is not my own, nor do I claim to have created it.  Photobucket doesn't often assign credit, so if it's yours, let me know and I'll be glad to give credit where credit is due.

2.  All opinions expressed on this page are my own.  Don't hate.

3.  Content is my own, protected under copyright laws.  If you want to link or use something I've written, put on your big girl or big boy panties and just ask.  I'm not that hard to get along with.

4.  If you'd like to give me scads of money for entertaining you, let's talk.  I'll have my lawyer call your lawyer.

Now, let's hit the water cooler shall we?

Linkies to Some of My Favorite Places

This is a work in progress, but when it's done, you can come back and see the pages and blogs that make me squee.  Another subtle act in the war on aging.  Plus, I love the word.  Squee.  Isn't that just fantabulous?

Okay so links are coming, promise.  But I found this on a site I follow and decided this would be a great way to start the new year.  So in January, I'll be doing this on BOTH my blogs, which should be interesting since each has a totally different perspective and I'm thinking I'll go further towards discovering the many aspects of myself that coexist in the same skin.




30 Days of Truth
The idea is simple: 30 days, a topic a day, to tell the absolute truth. 

I thought this was a genius idea, even the title. Sometimes it is very hard to speak the truth, even to yourself. Many of the topics will be easy to talk about, answers I have known forever, others may prove to be questions I’ve never asked myself because I am simply afraid of the answer. I am hoping that my responses will surprise me—teach me some new things, and reaffirm the things I’ve known all along. 

It’s bound to be a journey of some sort. 

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

Inspiration of the PinUp Variety

Starting a new blog is like giving birth.

You get this idea in your head, and then it scratches and claws its way out of you until you've got something you're proud to put out there to show the masses.

I'll remind you now that the proper response is to "Oooooh" and "Ahhhhh".  Thank you very much.

With that thought in mind, I thought I'd share some of my inspiration for the look and feel of this blog, well and I love the art so it works.

I'll be using some of these pieces to change the feel of the blog for certain events and seasons so check back often and enjoy the show!

About Me? I'm Not Old, I'm Vintage.

Vintage is good.  Vintage is in.  Vintage is a much lovelier word than old.

Since you clickied on the link, allow me to draw you a visual before we begin.

Feather boas and heeled slippers.

Dry martinis, neat.

Updo.

Cigarette holder.

Perfect nails.

Well behaved child.

Adoring husband.

Help.

Educated.

Sophisticated.

Summer in the Hamptons.

Now, hold that image.  Got it?

That is NOT me.

That would be graceful and honey, no one has ever called me Grace.

I'm a walking, talking accident waiting to happen.  I sleep too much, don't vacuum enough, usually have dishes in the sink and don't particularly mind a day or two without shaving my legs.  

I wouldn't know what to do with hired help and I've never even seen the Hamptons from a distance, although I hear they're lovely in the summer.

The last time my hair was in an updo was senior prom, and although I manage heels remarkably well, slippers are for scuffing around the house in.  Mine are cows.  Big, obnoxious cows.  They match my pj pants though so it's all good.

I've never owned a feather boa, and if I had one, the cat would eat it.  Nothing sexier than cat saliva when you're trying to get frisky.

So no, I'm none of those elegant, classy things.  I am fairly intelligent, or at least I like to think so.  Hate martinis, can't keep a manicure from chipping to save my life either.  But I do have a great kid and an adoring husband.  So I get props for that.

I'm not even trying for graceful anymore, I'm a warrior now, fighting this aging thing all the way, after all, it's true what they say.

Lifes journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but to skid in sideways, totally worn out screaming "Holy shit, what a ride!"